I want to be unapologetic, guilt-free, and blissfully live my life! I want to stop thinking about what I am supposed to do and just live my life. I want to stop feeling guilty and thinking about the people I’m disappointed with my decisions. I want to stop looking at my body with disgust, looking at all of society’s imperfections. I want to fall in love with whoever I want without fear of breaking religious and cultural restrictions. I want to share all the pain in my heart without hearing, “This is God’s will” or “God will get you through this.” I want to share my beliefs without being told I’m wrong. I want to stop always having to be a strong black woman.
Maybe this is too much to ask for, or I should say fuck it and do me, my constant internal dilemma.